Men and Postpartum Depression The Silent Struggle
When we hear the words postpartum depression, most people immediately think of mothers. But here’s the truth: men can also experience depression and anxiety after the birth of a baby. It’s just not talked about nearly enough.
For new dads, the pressure is real. You’re expected to be the strong one—the protector, provider, the “rock” while your partner heals. But what happens when you’re silently struggling yourself?
Yes, dads can get postpartum depression
Research shows that about 1 in 10 men experience postpartum depression. In fact, some studies suggest that the rate may climb as high as 1 in 4 when their partner is also depressed. And yet, most men don’t reach out for help—often because they don’t recognize the signs or because they feel ashamed to admit they’re having a hard time.
Why it happens
Just like mothers, fathers go through huge life shifts after welcoming a baby. Lack of sleep, changes in hormones (yes—men’s testosterone levels can drop after becoming fathers), relationship stress, financial worries, and the overwhelming responsibility of caring for a newborn can all contribute.
Some men describe feeling:
Disconnected from their baby
Irritable or angry
Withdrawn from their partner
Constantly tired but unable to rest
Guilty for not being “excited enough” about fatherhood
Why it matters
Untreated depression doesn’t just affect the dad—it can impact the whole family. Studies have shown that babies of depressed fathers are at higher risk for emotional and behavioral challenges later in life. Relationships may also suffer if men feel isolated or misunderstood.
The good news
Help is available, and recovery is absolutely possible. Therapy, support groups, lifestyle changes, and in some cases, medication can make a huge difference. But the first step is acknowledging that men deserve support in the postpartum period, too.
Practical ways to support dads
Check in with him, too. Moms often get asked “How are you doing?”—but partners need that question just as much. A simple, “How are you holding up?” can open the door to honesty.
Share responsibilities. Even small things like taking turns with feedings, managing household tasks, or scheduling downtime can ease the mental load.
Encourage breaks. Just like new moms, dads need time to recharge—whether that’s a quick nap, a workout, or seeing a friend.
Watch for red flags. If your partner seems withdrawn, irritable, or unlike himself for more than a couple of weeks, it may be time to suggest professional help.
Seek support together. Attending a therapy session, support group, or new-parent class as a couple can normalize the experience and strengthen your connection.
Normalize feelings. Remind each other that feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or even sad doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent—it means you’re human.
When moms and partners check in with one another regularly, it builds a stronger foundation for the entire family.
A gentle reminder
If you’re a new dad struggling, know this: you’re not weak, and you’re not alone. Asking for help is not a failure—it’s one of the strongest, most loving things you can do for yourself and your family.
